Dating has never been mentioned on this blog before. But, at the moment it’s a big part of my life, and this blog is about my life. So here goes.
In April this year I decided to join the world of online dating. I have been on it before, many years ago – several of my relationships have been from the online world.
This time, I joined because I wanted to add some further depth to my life. I have an amazing circle of loyal friends, I have a career but I also wanted to meet more men. Casual fun? Dating? Romance? To find the love of my life? Honestly, I didn’t know what I was after – most likely a mix of all the above. Lets just throw myself in and see what happens.
I started on eHarmony, where I met a fabulous guy who I was completely enamoured with. Charming, intelligent, successful. Out of respect for him, I won’t go into any details but needless to say it didn’t work out. Thankfully, he remains in my life albeit in a very small way.
Now, I am working Oasis. After being on it for a few short days/weeks I thought it was a site for booty calls. Essentially you review peoples profiles, you like them (or not), and if you’re connected, you start chatting!
I. Chat. A lot.
Luckily for me I’ve had some amazing dates from it. Interesting people, interesting conversation. I’ve learnt a lot about the process, communication, men and myself.
I’ve also come to the realisation I’ve never really dated before. I’ve been in relationships, sure. But not done the dating rounds and far out it is a hard gig. The world certainly does have some interesting characters in it! But other than that it’s relentless. I am sure there are many of you who understand what I am talking about….
But, the more I do it, the more I realise how much I don’t know. it has given me a better understanding of what I do want from life and a partner. And more importantly what I need. What does a healthy relationship look like for me? What makes me happy? What’s negotiable in a partner? And what’s not? What annoys me? The answers are not always what I originally thought.
I’ve also learnt the importance of hedging ones bets. Is this wrong? I find that when I like someone, I need to all of a sudden have a full pipeline of men to chat with and date – just in case in goes pear shaped.
Who knows if any of these suitors will work out but the only thing I can do is try to be open, honest and hope I meet that special someone. And if not, at least have a damn good time!
If anyone has any suggestions or recommendations about dating (or dates!!!) please drop me a line! I am more than willing to hear it.